the valley goes green. i look up into a canopy of leaves pegging up laundry. up with the sun, watering the new pine trees they gave out at work, cooing at seedlings, turning the compost before dressing and driving away. good to get up and complete morning chores in early light, having someplace to go, to work, to be of use. the world seems insanely miraculous now.
i put a seed in the ground and food grows up. fragrant flowers emerge from winter dead branches. the world is not punishing. there is warm sunlight and gentle breezes. bare feet in evening grass. long days, the very verge of night spent weeding just a little more, just one more toss of the frisbee to the dog, just standing there listening to your kids shout and laugh.
the variety of life is dazzling. what an immeasurably precious gift.
my pavlovian experiment is still in its nascent stages. ive applied a great deal of thought to all of this, and every day i learn something new about myself and the world and its perspective. getting enough distance to see the pattern. acknowledging myself as part of the pattern, neither greater nor less than any other.
my horoscope: (rising sign) "More than ever before, you have the power to
want what you actually have . . . to enjoy the fruits of your labors . . . to
take your attention off the struggle so that you may fully love the
experiences your struggle has earned you."
(sun sign) "Let the holy water wash you free of guilt,
remorse, and any habit of mind that tricks you into being mean or
careless toward yourself."
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Blessed Be.